Chiari may be the Culprit

DO You think it could be Chiari? Are you looking for answers?
Review this comprehensive list of Chiari Symptoms and see if you should consult your doctor.

Speaking Out About Chiari Awareness

I'm having a rough time of it.
I'm not going to lie.
And I'm sick, sick, sick of putting on my game face.
I'm tired of smiling when I don't want to.
I'm tired of saying I feel great when I don't.
And I'm uber tired of people that don't get it.
How did I get this way?
Hmmmmm....
Let me count the ways.

So, I'm working 12 hour shifts at work on a busy, busy, busy unit.
My feet hit the door of the hospital and I don't stop until I walk out 12, 13 or 14 hours later.
No breaks..and maybe, if the planets are aligned and all is right with the world, I get to eat lunch.
That's nursing, folks..nursing with all the glitz and glam.
I'd like to say, "That's why they pay us the big bucks.".. But I'd have to say that with the fake smile I'm tired of  wearing..
All of you nurses get the humor in THAT statement.

It's not that I don't like my job.  I do like it. I like the people I work with and I actually like being busy as hell.
So what's my point?
My point is:  My body doesn't like it.
I get home, where dinner is usually waiting on the table for me..scarf it down..walk to my room, shower, sit on the bed and the next thing I know the alarm is going off and it's time to do it again.
I realize this is regular for every nurse, and I'm not saying I'm being treated unfairly. I knew this would be my life when I took on these 12's.
The problem is, my brain is rebelling.
Sometimes I think I audibly hear it laughing in the back ground, scoffing at my plans.
And sometimes, it's more than I can bare.
Sometimes, I give in..and spend my days off in a dark room, racked with sobs and dismay.
Other times I just file away the symptoms that are thrown at me (blurred vision, hearing loss, headaches, random numbness, tinnitus, etc) and don't focus on them.
Then, the next thing I know, I'm in the shower and my hand goes numb...so I crumple to the shower floor and cry. Then I realize I can't hear the water hitting the floor of the shower, so I cry harder..and I can't find a towel because my vision is blurred, I stifle the sobs and grope blindly for  a towel.  I calm myself down, wash my face and emerge from the bathroom shaky and exhausted.
My sweet husband typically looks at me at these times and says, "you don't feel good do you?"
Nine times out of ten--I look him straight in the eyes and I do what all Chiarians do..
I lie.
"No, I'm fine, I'm just a little tired"
He doesn't buy it, but goes along with it....and I love him for that.

 Am I looking for sympathy?
No Way!
I'm verbalizing what many Chiarians deal with every day.
This is our life..we all choose how we cope (or don't cope).
Our disorder doesn't define us, but it does control and effect us continually.

Last weekend, I was feeling particularly over-stressed and under the weather.
I worked several extra shifts, had lots of school work, and I had not spent even a few minutes on my personal business..PLUS--I've had no time to write..and writing keeps me grounded.
Anyway, Bob surprises me with last-minute tickets to a Ball, which, meant I HAD to go find something to wear. He shopped with me, we found my outfit..and stopped off for lunch at one of our favorite places, B. J.'s Brewhouse.

Bob and I at Freedom Ball 2013 at Downtown 301, Waco, TX

So we are there, feasting on Ahi Tuna (I'm a fish-a-holic) and a few seats down from us a guy sits  down.  I glance at him, like one normally glances at someone they don't know and I had to do a double-take...there on the back of his head, emerging from his cap was a well-healed, yet very prominent ZIPPER.

I mulled over the situation for 10 or 15 minutes..then finally approached him and asked the question:
"Would you mind telling me about your scar?"
He did.
And I was, in a word... Delighted.
Not that he said anything I didn't know.
But here he was, looking like a tough guy, shaved head, cap, watching football..and he spilled his guts to me about his Chiari experience since the mid-80's.
Now permanently disabled by it (because of his frequent vertigo and diminished critical thinking skills)--He said so many things that made me feel, at least for a little while...NORMAL.

Bob and I sat there and talked with him, heard his struggle and co-commiserated with  many points.

He said he was "done" with people that don't get it.
So called "friends" that say things like, "but you look okay" or "you don't seem sick".
He said he "cut them all loose".
Or "friends" that disappeared during his surgeries to only resurface later.
He said, "I'm not bitter about it...I just can't go there, real friends will be there no matter what-and through this, I found out I don't have many".
I told him I had similar experiences and felt very isolated.
I know my friend Katrina feels the same.
It's hard and it's lonely.
And it doesn't stop.

We exchanged phone numbers and have even exchanged a few texts since.  We are hoping to meet for dinner sometime soon and I really need that.
I need someone to walk through this with me..and not someone I want to lie to because I want so badly to feel good for them.
I despise the look on people's faces when I tell them I'm having symptoms again.
I despise it when  people say, "but you had surgery to fix it right?"
I despise it when I have to explain why surgery is not a cure.
But I despise it even more when I'm left to my own devices, when no one asks and when I realize that in reality, no one really cares.

Am I wallowing in self-pity?
Maybe
At the same time, this is Chiari Awareness Month..
Maybe the truth is....I just want others to be aware.
If you are a family member or friend of a Chiarian..give them a platform to talk about how they feel.
If not..and you found this randomly..go find a Chiari friend..you won't have to look far..there are more of us than you think.
And if you happen to be in that population of friends that dropped off the planet when your friend started dealing with this enemy we call Chiari-
-Shame on you!
You have no idea how you may have hurt them by your neglect.

September is Chiari Awareness Month....Forward my blog.....create awareness.....donate to a Chiari association or help a Chiarian with their financial needs...Just do something.
Little things mean a lot.

Thanks to Chris Prevatt for sharing his story with me...and to Katrina Powell for being honest about her isolation since surgery (and to Misty for being her steadfast friend).

And to the handful of people that have emailed, text, or FB'd me because I haven't posted in awhile-Thank you for your concern.  Just know I'm doing all I can to beat Chiari every day. Your support means so much.

Possibilities

Well, sports fans..it's been a heck of a week.
I pulled off another week of  three back to back 12 hr shifts.
I was exhausted, but still decided to pick up an extra 4 hr. shift on Thursday morning.
Which seemed like a great idea until about 3 a.m. Thursday morning.
I felt something, I'm not sure what but something jolted me awake.
In the dimness of my bedroom, I opened my eyes.
Something was very wrong.
Something was not right.
I had no vision from my left eye.
None.
I covered my right eye, nothing.
I covered my left eye..I could see everything.
I closed both eyes, whispered a prayer..and waited.
Slowly, vision returned, by noon, it still looked as though my left eye were seeing through a tinted window.  Dimmed vision, dull pain, mixed with intermittent ice pick headaches.
If you've never had an ice pick headache..it's exactly what it sounds like and it stops you in your tracks. Nothing else in the world matters until the ice pick goes away.
This sent me to bed immediately after lunch, around 1:30 pm.
I managed to rally for dinner with my husband..whom I did my best to hide this from.
I guess we all know that feeling.
You're so damned sick and tired of complaining, whining, being the "sick" person...So you are just embarrassed to even say the words out loud.
Eventually, it all spilled out..but that made it no better.
I spent all day Friday in bed...this was the day I had earmarked for getting my homework done...a total waste.
I finally took enough narcotics to knock it out, and knocked myself out in the process.
I did call the doctor who said the usual.."You should probably go to the emergency room--if it get's worse, please go".
I, of course, ignored this warning.
I have had a month without insurance..and honestly, just didn't want to go.
It's like being a science project to people.
If they've heard of Chiari (which is rare), they pull up a chair and pick your brain...If they haven't, you are in for the time of your life, either being treated like you have a glorified migraine OR like you are having a stroke OR like you are insane.
So, anyway, I woke up yesterday feeling good, conquered a little schoolwork then went to the grocery store with my sweet husband..Of course, like an unwanted friend..Chiari smacks me right there in the cheese section.
Jab! Jab! Jab!  Ice pick headache.. vision loss..blurred vision.
I steady myself against Bob, we finish our shopping and head home.
Every minute task becomes a major chore-putting away the groceries, washing the few dishes that were in the sink..by the time I finish, I have tears on my cheeks.
I go to the shower, climb in and turn it on as hot as possible.
I stand there and wail loudly, hoping my sobs are drowned out by the sounds of the shower.
I'm sick of this.
Sick sick sick!
Why?
Why does it have to be like this?
Why me?
Why?
I'm broken, my tough exterior cracked, the Wonder Woman persona I try to evoke and project shatters to the shower floor.  I sit there in the corner of the shower, like a child..all of the possibilities going through my head.."Maybe my surgery has failed, maybe my arachnoid cyst is back, maybe I am having a stroke, maybe I should go to the hospital, my left foot HAS been numb for over a week-that CAN"T be a good sign, maybe my ex husband was right, I'm damaged, I'm broken, I CAN"T BE FIXED"... I finally pull myself out of the shower, crawl into bed, sobbed some more.
I text my friend Kelly, she's always there to encourage..
I'm pretty sure she was text yelling at me..
Telling me I'm strong and tough and blah blah blah...
She even threw in the "You is smaaart, you is kind..."  You know the line, right?
 I was not hearing it.
I was knee deep in self-loathing, tears falling so fast, my hair was wet and sticky..My head throbbed even worse, but I couldn't stop. This isn't fair, this isn't MY life.. I'M tired of being THIS person!
At some point, I fell asleep, alone in my dark room. No television, no Bob..just me and my freaking constricted cranium.
Bob eventually came to bed. I woke up, but couldn't move. My left hand and fingers were asleep, and no, I wasn't laying on them..they were just numb and tingly..my right fingers were tingling, my left foot was mostly numb, my head throbbed and I just wanted, for a brief moment, to disappear.  To be painless, to not have the weight of the world on my shoulders..to not wonder what surprises await me next or if I'll be able to handle full time work and/or school.
I just wanted to be someone different. Someone whole. Someone worthy of being loved.
Then, God very kindly allowed me to sleep.
This morning, I woke up pain free. Snuggled beside me was my sweet husband, still loving me in spite of it all.  The headache has waxed and waned all day, ice picks have poked me a few times..but all in all it's been a good day. School work completed and I'm preparing for work tomorrow...3 more 12 hour shifts to tackle.
Yes, I still have the possibilities running through my head, tomorrow I will make Dr. appts and take a real look at the problems that could be lurking deep in my skull.
But for now, I'm better..and I keep singing this song I learned as a kid in children's choir,
 "I am a promise..I am a possibility..I am a promise.."
Well, here..I found a clip of it.. And no, I don't know these little kiddos..BUT yes, I cried listening to it..I don't know why God wants me to walk this path..But..I'll buck up and keep walking.

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qo7Kh5zhdUY

September is Chiari Awareness Month..Talk to people about Chiari.
If you are a Chiarian..Welcome, Friend-You are not alone.

August Update!

Wow, I can't believe I haven't posted in a month..Where has the time gone?
Well, let me tell you what I've been up to.
A LOT!

As of yesterday, I'm 7 mths post op. My posterior fossa decompression seems like a distant memory.  (Which I hope doesn't mean my memory is impaired..darn brain damage..LOL!)

I've gone back to work. This week marked my first week of working three 12 hour shifts back to back since surgery..and (drum roll, please)...I DID IT!

Every night I got home, bone-tired..if you don't know what "bone-tired" means..then..YOU have never worked hard enough.
Sometime late afternoon on Monday, the interior aspect of my left foot and toes went numb, and have been ever since, then about mid-way through the day on Tuesday, My vision blurred..(so I bought stronger reading glasses that night after work)..and Wednesday, I barely remember. I realized that about 7 out of 10 times I have a delay when answering the phone at work..which kinda bothers me..but on day one it was 10 of 10 times, so I think that's improving.

This is what I am happiest about..My thinking is clear, concise and intact. I am having no trouble with giving medications, dosages or charting details (even with learning a new charting system).  I'm very pleased with this, as my livelihood as a nurse depends on it.  That being said, I NEVER had any problems with that..even when my brain was foggy pre-operatively, I could still pull off my job without a hitch.

Now, another big hurdle..I started back to grad school.  I'm certain I've shared somewhere along the way that I'm working on my Masters of Science in Nursing, Family Nurse Practitioner track- I had to take a leave of absence in January because of all the neurosensitivity post op. (i.e.-I couldn't look at the bright light of the screen on my laptop).  Well, I started a class in July to see if I was ready to go back yet..and let me tell you- I had crazy doubts about myself.
I would read a paragraph, re-read it and..nothing.
I called my mom, had a break down, told her I just couldn't do it, that I was no longer smart.
Of course, she suggested it was too much with work, new marriage, etc.
I literally failed (anything less than an 83 was failing) every test.
I passed my case studies, but could not perform under pressure.
This class cost me $1860...for ONE class.  If I make less than 83, I have to repeat the class before I can advance.
So after my next test, which I failed, I have a crying break down.  This same day, financial aid offices from both of my children's colleges had called, and I was tired from work (just 8 hr work days, but still exhausting)..I tell Bob..."I can't do this, I'm not smart anymore, my eyes hurt, my head hurts.."
He said, "Honey, you can do whatever you want to-you are the smartest woman I know."

So..I had a talk with myself..
In Mississippi, people would've called it a "Come To Jesus" talk.
It went like this:
"I can't do this, it's too hard"
"You're right, you should just quit"
"Quit?-- I'm not a quitter"
"Yes you are, and it's okay, after all you had BRAIN SURGERY..no one expects you to do anything productive ever again, you will be lucky if you can hold down a job, much less finish school, become a pilot--or really-ever do anything besides just manage to get by..Just quit now..it's too  *&^%$#! hard" 

I messaged my friend, Kelly--who is in nursing school right now (and I am so very proud of her..Kelly--you go girl!).--and who I must say is my biggest cheerleader (aside from Bob).
Kelly, from many miles away, has cheered me on in every endeavor over the past few years....and is PRICELESS in my life..and of course, once again she reminded me that I CAN DO IT!

So-I regrouped...
I thought back to nursing school.
I went back to the basics of how I studied then, I color coded, I organized...and I took that final exam..and I PASSED!  Not only that I went from, "Oh I may not pass"  to " I made an A!!" 

 So let me tell you, my fellow Chiarians-- You may be having a difficult time right now..but you can get through it.  You can get better and your life can be better. If I can..ANYONE can! There is nothing special about me. I just refuse to give up.

I attribute my recovery success to taking Juice Plus+ , but the rest..is prayer and stubborn determination.  Yes, I break down- Yes, I have moments of despair-and Yes--I cry often and second guess myself. I still have pain, numbness, occasional trouble swallowing and speaking. Some mornings I don't know how I'm going to make it through the next hour, much less the whole day. That's when I remember the words of Elisabeth Eliot in her book A Path Through Suffering, when she talks about how she got through her period of grieving ...she said she just did what was next..even if that was just brushing her teeth..One step at a time, do what is next..But do SOMETHING!! Don't give in to what Chiari does to our bodies and our lives. Make a plan..then make a back up plan.
My back up plan is my Juice Plus+ franchise..just in case my stubbornness doesn't ultimately pay off or I ever need an extended time off work again..I want a back up income source, a back up insurance source. I never want to be afraid of not being able to care for myself again.

Be honest with yourself. Be honest with your family.
Let your fears spill out onto the floor..then one by one-sweep them into manageable piles and do what is next..
Face your fears...remember me getting into that airplane for my first lesson? 
What's next for me?  Another work week starts Monday, along with another class, my new business goals, and my newest blog waiting for another post
More challenges..more fears...and of course, more symptoms...
So, I'm going to just do what's next..
And right now, that's folding laundry :-(!

Have an awesome day! 

Michele

Chiari Flies...So Should You!

My latest post from my flying blog....Yes..Chiari Flies..and NO problems with dizziness or headaches!
http://andsosheflies.blogspot.com/2013/07/what-i-learned-on-our-quick-trip-to-new.html

Take control of your health..at LEAST give your body all it needs to fight Chiari.
Ask me about how Juice Plus+ can help you in your recovery, how your children can take it for free and how you can gain supplemental income if you need it.

Visit my websites:

Juice Plus    Tower Garden 

www.theoriginalchiaritarian.wordpress.com 

1/2 ZIPPERVERSARY Reflections

Yesterday marked 6 mths since my Chiari Decompression. 

Wow! --What  a Journey!

What have I learned? 

A LOT! 

I've learned that patience is vital in recovery, patience with yourself, patience with others. 

I've learned that for every person that supports you..two will let you down. 

I've learned that people are afraid of you when you have an illness. 

I've learned that total strangers will show you kindnesses that the closest friends will not. 

I've learned to accept disappointments and grow from them. 

I've learned to truly forgive myself. 

I've learned to truly forgive others. 

I've learned that it's okay to have a limited life in some areas, because it causes you to live an unlimited life in other ways. 

I've learned to face fears with faith and resolve. 

I've learned that hair really does cover the scar...but the scar never leaves any part of your being. 

I've learned that being truly loved, regardless of flaw, blemish or illness IS possible. 

I've learned to get second, third and fourth opinions and to not feel guilty for being my own advocate or for challenging an ALMIGHTY doctor. 

I've learned that there truly are physicians that care. 

I've learned that there truly are physicians that could care less. 

I've learned I am in control of my health and well being, where at one time I felt Chiari was totally in control. 

I've learned to push all the research  into a pile, dive in and pull out what applies to me and to be comfortable with it, regardless of criticism or opinions of others.

I've learned that if I spend too much time thinking and talking about my symptoms I have more of them. 

I've learned that I can treat my body with proper nutrients. 

I've learned that I don't want to be a slave to medications, doctor visits or PT sessions. 

I've learned dry needling is VERY painful, yet VERY beneficial. 

I've learned that some of my best inspiration and support has come from people I've never met face to face..but whom I will never forget. 

I've learned a lot in the past 6 months. 

Thank you for supporting me through it. 

I got married to my best friend during this time.

I've  developed more of a love for writing, I've been taking flying lessons, I've authored three blogs and am almost finished with a book about Chiari. 

I've looked for alternative income and gotten involved with a great company, Juice Plus, that has changed my recovery and has given me a vehicle to help my friends, family and fellow Chiarians.

And offers me unlimited income potential, something I probably would not have done otherwise.

For me, this past 6 months, though sometimes horrible and painful..

Has been a gift. 

I am blessed, forever changed

and excited about what my future holds. 

Happy 1/2 Zipperversary to Me! 

Become a Chiaritarian!

I'm becoming more disgruntled with a society that won't take their health into their own hands.
Why do we complain about doctors that don't listen, but take their little poisonous pills anyway?
Many People totally disregard nutrition in their quest for wellness.

I hate to admit I fell into this trap for a few months. I lived in despair and "Poor Me" mentality.
Thankfully, a month ago today, I took my life back.
I changed my way of eating and got back on Juice Plus+.
Within 2 weeks, I was sleeping all night.
Now, I've gone over 2 weeks with no dizziness.
I can feel my body healing itself.
No more mid-day naps.
I actually crave healthy foods. I crave green veggies and fruits.

Juice Plus+ has made all the difference. I even became a distributor. I want everyone I know to take it, to thrive. Backed by 31 research studies over the past 20 years, Juice Plus+ sets the standard on nutrition and is proven to reduce visits to the doctor. Any company that will allow children to take it's product for free deserves a second look.

Why did I become a distributor? Because I believe it works. I believe as Chiarians we have so many things working against us, we have to fight back with all we can. When I take my capsules or  chewies, I am fighting back...and I am winning.  AND-I'm making money doing it.  Just this week I've earned a nice bonus, and have another looming in the near future.

I think of all of the people I know and I become crazed. People with diabetes, asthma, allergies, high blood pressure, heart disease, liver disease, children with autism..I wish I could afford to pay for Juice Plus+ for everyone.  My advice, figure it in to your grocery budget..It IS whole foods. 17 servings of fruits, veggies and grains in 2 capsules twice a day. Make a choice. Choose a better life, choose fewer doctor visits, choose to read the research, choose to live life to the Plus+. Become a Chiaritarian and feed your body a healthy food prescription every day! I'm doing it and feeling great!

http:/mcollum.juiceplus.com        www.theoriginalchiaritarian.wordpress.com

Juice Plus fundraiser details:
 I want everyone I know to take Juice Plus..it is so vital to nourishing your body on a cellular level! There is a children's health study that will allow your child to take it for free. Juice Plus Central Texas (my own personal franchise) will donate $5 to the Conquer Chiari Walk for every duo  (orchard/garden blend) or $7 for every Trio (orchard/garden/vineyard) ordered in July if the customer lets me know they are trying it in support of Chiari. Visit my website for more info on Juice Plus and how clinical research proves it benefits the body http://mcollum.juiceplus.com

If you need an excuse to do something healthy for yourself and your family..THIS IS IT!
Just place your order and message me that you did it for Chiari research! mmrobinson68@gmail.com

Conquer Chiari Walk 2013

I just registered for the Conquer Chiari Walk in Dallas/Ft. Worth on Sept. 21. I deliberated for awhile about which walk to participate in and decided to go local. All money raised goes directly to Conquer Chiari, an organization that heads up research. Donations can be made at https://www.conquerchiari.org/ccwaa13/MicheleCollum. 

I will be doing a Juice Plus fundraiser, mainly because I want to encourge all Chiarians to add this to their diet. It is vital that our cells get these nutrients to heal properly. Instead of advocating so much with our doctors, let's take control of our health and not let Chiari be in control so much. Learn more about Juice Plus at http://mcollum.juiceplus.com  Read the clinical research and let me know what you think!

Caution-Adding Heat May Be Hazardous To Your Cranium

I've been told that Chiari and high temperatures don't mix.
In the past, during hot, hot, hot Mississippi summers, I remember feeling like my body was weighted down in the heat, like sand bags were sitting on my shoulders daring me to make a move.
See-I don't know if that was a normal feeling, my normal wasn't everyone else's normal.
I kept hearing people say that heat made them worse, well, I've stayed out of the heat, so I didn't know for sure.
I'm one of those "seeing is believing" people.
You could call me hard-headed, but that would be kind of a joke since my head as a perforation in the back.
I set out to draw my own conclusions about the heat. 
For me--it went like this:

I spent about 30 minutes out in the direct sunlight at a car show with my husband this past weekend.
I was fine, sipping water..no problem.
Suddenly, this pulsating started.
The back of my head, where my zipper is, was pounding.
I could feel every pulsation of CSF coursing through my constricted cranium.
An Olympic-sized Chiari headache ensued..and that is all I could think of. The headache, the pulsing.and a time or two I thought I might pass out.
Not wanting to be a poor sport, I said nothing to my husband.
I smiled, answered his questions and kept my eyes focused directly ahead of me.
I became afraid to turn my head, for fear vertigo may attack me.
I did not complain or even whimper.
After a few minutes, he looked at me and said, "It's time to go, you're fading fast".
I mustered up a little enthusiasm and said, "Oh no, we don't have to. " (all the while saying in my head, "Thank You, Jesus!")
We made our way to our car, got in, turned the A/C on and started to cool off.
Cooling off took a good 30-45 minutes.
Then I noticed a swollen spot on the back of my head, the pulsating was still in place and the swollen spot was super tender.  I kept drinking water and wishing I had a Valium, or a Lortab, or even a razor blade..anything to end the pulsating and the headache.  Then, Bob started asking questions. He needed directions to our next stop. Oh my gosh, really..I'm trying to not freak out here!
As I opened my mouth to speak, I realized it was very difficult to get my words out.
For an hour or two I felt like I was right back at my immediate post-op state.
My words continued to stack on top of each other and I slowly unstacked them and got them out. Why on Earth did the heat make it so difficult to speak?
We made the long trip back home (horrible traffic) and I eventually took some meds and my headache calmed down to a tolerable level.
I've not been pain free since, but I can live with it. As a matter of fact, I don't know the last time, if ever, that I've been 100% pain free. Pain is just a way of life for folks like me.
So..I've now contributed my time, energy and pain for the greater good.
Once and for all I've found the truth.
It is a proven fact: Chiari and heat do NOT mix.
Do not attempt this experiment at home and if it's hotter than 85 degrees, please proceed with caution.

A Word about Nutrition.

My latest efforts in healing my Constricted Cranium have to do with nutrition.
I just don't believe taking a pill does the trick.
I know we have anatomical issues that have to be addressed, no dietary supplement is going to change our anatomy, BUT, once it is changed, Once we are zipperheads, we owe it to our bodies to give it all the ammunition we can to make every cell as healthy as possible-that is my new mission.
I want to be in control of what I can control. I've felt so out of control of my body, I need to regain some power. Kris Carr calls our bodies our "God pods". Let's treat them as such.
I've always believed in the power of nutrition vs. the power of pharmaceuticals.
In the past three weeks, I've gotten really serious about it and jumped back in with both feet.
I got my Juice Plus+ supplements out of the freezer and started taking them again.
I removed soy from my diet
Disposed of gluten.
No casein.
I'm trying to get my 7-13 servings of fruit & veggies a day, but it's difficult. Even if that's all I eat it's difficult, that's where Juice Plus+ is bridging the gap.
Within the first week, I notice and improved amount of energy, then by the end of week two, It's obvious that this is why I'm sleeping better.  I'm totally off of all other medications. I take my Juice Plus+ capsules and sublingual D3 and B12 (just for extra oomph) and I'm sleeping like a baby.
It's so difficult to fit all the right things in everyday.
At the bare minimum I'm eating the following every single day:
1 cup blueberries
1/2 cup lentils
1 cup beans (this week it's pinto beans)

Then I just add in my other fruits and veggies to other meals.
Because I crave fish and I feel my brain needs it, I eat fish about every other day, though actually, I could eat it at every meal. 

I feel better and believe my outlook is better. I want to share my nutritional excitement with everyone, so if I become annoying, just ignore it! Just know I'm sharing because I want you to feel better too..we are all in this Chiari thing together.

I started another blog where I will plan to post recipes, what works or doesn't work, my ups and downs with food, etc. Please visit that site and I'll try to not let too much of it spill over on to this one.

Chiarians should avoid the following: soy, gluten, casein, preservatives, sugar. I avoid red meat and pork. I welcome any response as to what works for you.

My food blog is: www.theoriginalchiarian.wordpress.com  For more info on JuicePlus+ you can visit

http://mc13625.juiceplus.com/.

A popular youtube video tells about the science behind Juice+ AND as an added benefit, your children can take it free for participating in a health study..you just can't beat this product. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bWVLDinsozI

Wishing you a safe and symptom-free holiday weekend! As for me-yesterday's heat reminded me that heat and Chiari don't mix, so I'll be staying in and feeding my brain blueberries and watermelon!

Post of encouragement on chiarisupport.org

I posted my concerns about being 5 mths post op, yet not going back to work yet. I had many responses from people that admittedly had less strenuous jobs than I. I was thankful to get this reply this morning from an RN. I appreciate this anonymous poster sharing her experience.

I am also 5 months post op and an RN. I tried to go back to work at 3 months, knowing that I wasn't 100% but felt pressure to try and quickly realized that it was too soon. I was completely exhausted after a 4 hour shift. After those 4 hour shifts, I would come home and be so weak and fatigued that I would be in bed the rest of the day. I also started having severe neck pain and muscle spasms which I had not been having as bad, plus worse flashes and floaters in my vision which were present before surgery but had lessoned since the surgery.  My surgeon and also my PCP said that it was probably too soon for me to have gone back and my body was letting me know this. I was placed back on medical leave. I started having bad joint pain and a few other symptoms that are making my PCP wonder if I have developed an auto immune disorder which is complicating my recovery. I have a lot of trouble with cognitive issues some which I had prior to surgery, some that i developed after. Things like difficulty focusing, brain fog, short term memory loss, trouble with word finding. These had improved to the point where I felt I was safe to go back to work, but when I tried at that 3 months point, I realized that it was too much for me physically and mentally. I am also a wife and mother to 3 young kids, and now I struggle to get through the demands of just being at home each day. It is so frustrating to realize that I set myself back in my recovery and now I am having a hard time moving forward. My energy level is starting to improve only slightly on good days, but I can not push myself too hard or I pay dearly. I agree with previous posters that it really depends on the type of work that you do. Nursing is a very physically and mentally demanding job. I remind myself that I had a major surgery and that it was not a cure for the Chiari, just a treatment. I am still better than I was prior to surgery! I think we have to learn to give ourselves grace and listen to our bodies. It is so hard to do, but better for us in the long run. Just know you are not alone! Sometimes that helps more than anything. Hang in there!

Once Again, Chiari Messes Up My Plans!

http://andsosheflies.blogspot.com/2013/07/lesson-cancelled-due-to-bad-brain.html

The Man in the Moon

The man in the moon is really getting on my nerves.
I mean that literally-REALLY GETTING ON MY NERVES.
I'm 5 mths post op for Chiari decompression/arachnoid cyst fenestration.
I've had no VERTIGO since pre-op.
NONE.
A little dizzy, motion-sickness daily-but nothing I can't deal with.
This week...it's been Spin City (without Michael J. Fox).
Many are blaming in on the Super Moon.
The gravitational pull causes changes in tide, exacerbation of crime, babies to be born and now..an increase in symptoms of those with Chiari Malformation Type 1.
I hesitated to blame this on the moon.
I hesitated to blame this on the heat (I'm in hot, hot, hot Texas).
I suppose I would rather blame these two culprits rather than blaming Chiari itself.

Like an unwanted admirer, Chiari hangs around, shows up at the oddest places and at the damnedest times. (I had this admirer in high school that I kept saying "NO!" to, "No!" to dates, "No!" to giving him my phone number, "NO! NO! NO!"   He would not take "NO!" for an answer.  He even showed up at my house on Valentine's Day-with a puppy-(which we kept for years as a cherished family pet, but that doesn't matter here)- when I was waiting on my real dream date to show up--
AAAARRRGGGHHHH!! What kind of timing is that???  I mean, ..Couldn't he get the picture?   "NO" really means.."Go AWAY!!!"?

So this morning, I said aloud to Chiari.."While I appreciate that you want to be such a big part of my life, I think we need to take a break-so we can both really evaluate this relationship...How about I get back to you in about, oh....50 years...?"
As usual, Chiari said nothing.


I've noticed in the past few weeks, laughing with dinner guests, or really any laughing..I get dizzy.
But not the spinning. The spinning is the worst.
The headaches--yes, they are annoying.
Waking up with my limbs asleep and tingling--annoying.
Tinnitus and intermittent hearing loss..annoying.
Spinning...INCAPACITATING!
Spinning makes me not want to drive.
Spinning makes me not want to go for a walk.
Spinning is ruining my day..every day for the last week. 

So I guess I'm just saying..to the man in the moon.. to mother nature..
to the "Chiari-whisperer"... to whoever may be in control of this (because I'm certainly not in control of it!)--
Can you just stop this carousel? I want to get off. 
I was enjoying the "No Spin Zone" (borrowed that from O'Reilly) and I'd like to go back there.

If the Man in the Moon is the culprit-I'm ready for the Super Moon to orbit its way out of my atmosphere.

If the heat is causing my increased spinning..then I'm basically in for a long haul, summer has only just begun here in my beloved Texas.

Oh--why didn't I think of this sooner? Excessive centrifugal forces from the White House could be causing my problem. There are so many "spins" going on there, the atmosphere HAS to be affected!

So, I suppose I better settle in and hunker down, arm myself with valium, meclizine, a frosty beverage and a copy of the constitution, because if Wikipedia is correct--there's no end to any of these great forces wielding their power over me any time soon.

In Search of Bravery

Resounding in my head are those same familiar words, “You are so brave.”

I feel the doctor’s hand on my arm.  An oxygen mask is being placed over my face, muffling the voices in the room. I see the doctor’s lips moving and the syringe, milky white with medicine, poised over the IV port on my left hand.  I pray a quick prayer for my children. Again, I hear the words, “You are so brave.”

“Beep…Beep…Beep”

The sound snatches me back to reality. Ugh, what horrible aching in the back of my head.

“Beep...Beep…Beep”

Darkness fills the room, a face is nearby. I hear words. Muffled words I don’t recognize.  Damn my head hurts. I try to speak, unable to make my voice come out. Tears roll down my cheeks, yet I can’t move my arms to wipe them away. I can’t move my neck to either side, so they puddle there, beneath the oxygen mask.  I hear the words again in my head, “You are so brave.”

Now, five months later, watching a news report about a “brave” little girl who just received a double lung transplant, the report says the ominous words, “She is so brave.”  Immediately, I take issue with the comment, my suppressed rage surfacing.  At the television screen I blurt the words, “No she isn’t! She didn’t have a choice! That is not bravery! That is necessity! That is survival!”

I quickly Google the ominous word.  Dictionary.com gives me the following definition:  Bravery: 1. “possessing or exhibiting courage or courageous endurance”. Upon reading this, I cross-reference courage: “the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear; bravery”. Aha!  I’m right…!

Don’t get me wrong. I am not minimizing the tragic life of this little girl. In no way do I wish to minimize her struggle or her resilient story. My issue is more personal. My issue is rooted in my own experience. Earlier this year, I had brain surgery. Last year, I was diagnosed with a rare brain disorder, Chiari Malformation Type 1. Within ten minutes of getting the diagnosis, the wonderful world wide web had secured in my mind the scary reality that I faced brain surgery.

The weeks and months that followed are a blur of doctors’ appointments, MRI’s, lumbar punctures, dizzy spells and headaches. There were also many comments or referrals to my courage, to my bravery. People actually commented on how “strong” I was.  I remember thinking, “Really?” All the while, I just forced a smile on my face, saying nothing to these comments. 

People need a way to comfort others. I understand this. I know they meant no harm. I may seem callous or cold for taking this stance against the misuse of the word “bravery”. My intention is not to be argumentative. My intention is to give bravery, and those worthy of the label their due respect. Bravery is a young boy joining the U. S. Army, choosing the Infantry, knowing he will be sent to Afghanistan to face possible death. Bravery is a firefighter charging into a burning building to save a stranger. Bravery is a regular person stopping a robbery. Bravery is a son standing up to his father saying, “You will not hurt my mother any longer.” 

Double lung transplants, brain surgeries and chemo treatments…these are not the makers of brave people. These ordeals, events, illnesses…these breed survivors, survivors with no choice other than to press forward, to work the plan, to give in to the process. Many, possibly all, having no interest in becoming another lab rat of the medical community or their names added to the prayer list of every local church, or fundraisers held in their honor.  No option was given to not participate. Participation was thrust upon them.

Call me a fighter, call me a survivor, or call me a winner. I’ll even take the label of resilient or long suffering. Just please, I beg of you, when it comes to my weird brain thing-don’t call me brave. 

Bravery doesn’t cry in the night while the rest of the world sleeps. Bravery doesn’t snivel and cower its head, apologizing for being such a burden on others. Bravery doesn’t scream, “Get me out of this MRI machine, I can’t take it anymore”. Bravery isn’t lost on the unwilling, unconscious choices of victims.

Bravery does face a jury and say, “He raped me.” Bravery does lead police officers into bad neighborhoods to rescue the innocent. Bravery does risk everything to escape from an abusive husband. These things bravery is made of. Bravery combats fear, and beats it to a bloody pulp.

Have I been brave? Oh yes, I know I have. I have brave moments no one will ever see. Moments I know I showed courage. I just submit that facing, undergoing and surviving brain surgery was not the work of my bravado. Having Chiari was not my choice. I am not brave in that respect.

Sometimes I’m ashamed of my weakness. Chiari weakened my spirit. I felt it, but could not stop it. I felt my self-worth, self-esteem and self-respect slowly drifting away from me. I gave in to the process of surgery, healing and recovery.  I became victimized and depressed. I felt alone and abandoned. I felt anything but brave.

Now, five months into recovery, as health and normalcy slowly return, I am repulsed by my previous weakness, my sadness, my despair. I’m embarrassed by the tears I shed and the time I wasted being angry with my body for being so flawed. In my mind the words of many people reverberate, “You are so brave.”  I think of this and I just want to throw up. “If they only knew,” I think, “If they only knew”

This obvious lack of control, lack of bravery, lack of courage has spurred me on.  Propelled into a realm of wanting to live up to the brand, I want to be brave. Visibly brave. Undeniably,  courageously brave. Not just a survivor of life. At the end of my life I don’t want to get a participation ribbon with the rest of my team. I want to be deemed a worthy contender. I want to win first place. Okay, I’ll settle for being in the top three.

 What brave thing can I do?  I am a middle –aged  grandmother living in Central Texas. I’m a registered nurse, but I checked  and I’m too old to join the military. Besides, with my medical history, I’d never get in.

Awake in the middle of the night, I’m looking at my new husband. Bravery exudes from him He is a total Boy Scout. His resume boasts military service, commercial airline pilot, former FFDO (Federal Flight Deck Officer), production test pilot. He is proficient with a firearm, or with any firearm for that matter.  I starkly compare myself with him. I’m a sniveling victim of a brain disorder. I possess a permit to carry a concealed weapon, but secretly hope he will be with me should I ever need to use it. He is brave. I am not. I am scared to be brave. I am afraid to choose bravery. I am anything but fearless.

Then, I make a decision. 

The next morning I approach the topic with him.  I want to become a pilot. We’ve talked about this before, but I had little resolve or real intent. I mean, my gosh. Flying scared the hell out of me. I pray every time I take off on a commercial flight, with every bump of turbulence and with every landing. I realize this is a choice. I realize in order to do this I must be brave. I’m not running into a burning building…but this is my own brand of bravery, mastering my will, conquering my fear.

A plan evolves. Once I am flying independently, I will make a cross –country flight to raise awareness of my disorder.  Zipper Flight (the scars of Chiari decompression surgery resemble zippers in the back of the head) will be the name of this journey. I will be brave for not only myself, but for every person fighting this disorder and for the countless lives lost in the battle.  Completion of this will deem me “brave”.  I now crave braveness like once craved chocolate.

On the morning of my first flight lesson, I’m shaking in my boots. I stand   in the office of the flight school with my headset, log book and flight bag. I know there is no way I’m getting in that airplane. Not today…not ever.  My instructor is running late. I look out over the ramp. I feel nauseous. What was I thinking? I’m not this person, I’m not brave. I’m okay with being a victim, really, I am.  Then I get a text from a friend that just had Chiari surgery. Chiari is destroying her life. She’s losing her job, her health insurance, facing second brain surgery. She’s thanking me for what I’m doing to raise awareness. Damn it!   I take a few deep breaths, go to the ladies room and splash water on my face.  I look in the mirror. I find some resolve. I scrape together a few bits of courage, squelch down the fear and  head  back out. 

Next thing I know I’m on the ramp next to the plane. My instructor is talking. My husband  is there to cheer me on. I want to run.  I make a choice. I get in the plane. I put on my headset. I fly.

I did it. I won. I know upon landing I never want to be that afraid again. I also know that if I am that afraid, I can conquer it. I tremble for the most part of the day. My fear almost won.  I keep thinking I may have made a mistake, I may not be able to fly. It’s too freaking scary. I re-live the moments of the lesson: getting into the plane, turbulence, feeling sick, feeling trapped, wanting  to get out, knowing I’m trapped in that little plane, the beauty of being up there, the magic of  flight, how blessed I am to be able to do this…

 Then I do something brave, I ask my husband to schedule my next lesson.  He did. The next lesson was not as scary, though I still had to coerce myself into the plane and had scary times with the controls.  But, I was brave. I chose to face fear. I’m proud of myself. 

My lessons will continue, as will my recovery. I will bravely pursue flying and I will give in to the process of Chiari. I may even  send a note of encouragement to the little girl with the double lung transplant. I won’t say she’s a brave little girl. I’ll say I hope she feels better soon. I’ll say I’m sorry she has been so sick. I’ll say I know the IV’s hurt and that the medicine tastes bad. I’ll say I want it to not be so hard.  I’ll say I know what it’s like to feel bad every single day.

 But brave, brave I will not say.

I won’t say it because she isn’t being brave. She is surviving, I refuse to insult her or diminish her struggle for life, her struggle just to breathe.

I will say that one day she will be well. One day she will have the choice of living in fear or showing courage.  I will tell her when this day comes, to be brave. I hope she will understand.

A still, small voice inside of me says that she will.  

Guest Blog by Mitchel Grace

Guest Blog today from my friend, Mitchel Grace. 

Mitchel is an aspiring writer from Mississippi. From his keyboard he pounded out his thoughts on fear and shared them with me this morning.

Enjoy!  

 

Fear  

by Mitchel Grace

 

     Fear is a subject that a lot of people don’t understand. Some people treat it as a defect in our emotions, and others treat it as a normal human emotion that keeps us from doing things we shouldn’t. Is it normal? It certainly seems that it is. Everywhere you look, someone somewhere is afraid of something. Is it healthy, though? I would say yes and no. We naturally fear death or losing the people we love. My friend, Michele Collum, has a rare disease called Chiari Malformation, and that is very scary. In truth, I knew almost nothing about this disease until I heard about her situation. This disease is something that someone should fear if they have it. Cancer is another disease that we should fear. Why do we fear these diseases, though? We fear them because they could take us away from the people we love. If we don’t beat these diseases, we’ll never have another opportunity to love our families or experience anything on this earth again. That fear is normal, and it’s healthy. We should always strive to live against all odds. 
     Here’s a thought I have concerning that, though. How many of us are actually living before we find out we’re living on borrowed time? We all talk about all the things we’re going to do in the future, then one day we wake up and realize there isn’t enough time to do those things anymore. We wasted our time being conservative and safe. Look where that gets us, though. We all leave this world with regrets, but most of them are because we didn’t do what we should have done.
       I’m still a young man, but I can honestly say that I let fear defeat me for twenty-four years. If I wanted to do something, I thought about everything that could be wrong with it until I talked myself out of it. I never talked to that girl who was supposedly a little out of my league, and I never truly expressed my own opinions. After all, my opinions were different than every other person around me. While other men in my area were obsessed with things like hunting, fishing, and cars, I was more into writing and music. I felt alone, and I was afraid that by stepping out of line and simply being who I was, I would be rejected. Last year that changed. I had always wanted to go to Europe. I wanted to go to Italy and to France. The cost was pretty astronomical because there were a lot of things I wanted to do there, and I was bringing two other people with me. I feared that somehow this experience would fall short of my expectations and I would be left with far less money and no experience to show for it. Was Europe overrated? Yes, not everything was like I thought it would be. Did I still have a unique experience that was truly needed at that point in my life? You better believe I did.'
      I didn’t stop there, however. I had always wanted to write a book. I lacked the confidence to do it in the past, but little by little I was gaining that confidence. After you’ve survived the Roman traffic with a crazy taxi driver you can do anything, I told myself. I started writing, but every time I did, something got in the way. I would write a chapter, and then fear would set in. I would think things like: Is this what people want to read? What are they going to say when they see this garbage? For some reason I just knew that what I was doing was going to be rejected by the people around me. I’m still afraid of that. When January rolled around, I had absolutely no writing material. I had literally erased everything I had ever written. That’s when I made a decision. I was going to start doing things the way I wanted to do them. So what if someone laughed at my story?  So what if someone might think that they could write a better story? The fact is that very few people actually write a book. If I was going to do this I had to conquer my fear. I wrote five to seven thousand words every day, and I refused to edit one word of it until I had finished my first book. It was raw, and in some places it might have even been a little ugly, but it was mine. I was proud, and more importantly, I was confident in what I had done. I continued writing because it was what I had always loved to do. 
     Then came the hard part. I started letting people know what I was doing and even let some people read what I had written. At first it was hard, but now it’s easy. The same principle works with everything else. I have read that Michele is learning to fly. For many people this is a very unnerving process, but it’s all worth it when we push ourselves to the limits of fear. It makes us stronger, and most importantly it makes us check off something on our list before the clock runs out. 
      So in closing, the only things we should really fear are losing the ability to make more moments and stretching ourselves to our limits. Stretch yourself to those limits, and remember one thing. You’ll never get another chance to live this day. Love like there could be no tomorrow, and just as importantly, fear and overcome that fear because you may wake up one day with a real reason to fear. We’re living on borrowed time, people. Learn to enjoy that time, and yes, I mean that you should even learn to enjoy the challenge and accomplishment of overcoming your own fear.

 Mitchel Grace
                 

http://findingmynichemitchelgrace.blogspot.com/

 

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Mitchel-Grace-Author/136015879920863?fref=ts

 

Flying the Symphony--5 mths post op

 Excerpt from my flying blog...Flying 5 mths post op......


                                                            

                                                             Flying The Symphony

 

Waco Flying Service's Symphony

 

So--Lesson #2--Much more eventful than Lesson 1.

 

So I mustered up all of my strength for my lesson this past Thursday--

Bob and I practiced Flight Simulator at home, where I crashed many, many times.

So I was a bit fearful of getting back in a plane.

Being really fearful made me decide it was the perfect time to actually get back in, before the fear became insurmountable.

So, there I am, Wednesday night--ready.
Flight bag packed, clothes, sunglasses and cap laid out for the early lesson.

Then Aaron texts saying we have to reschedule, a problem with the plane.

PROBLEM WITH THE PLANE???

This resounds in my head as I calmly look at Bob and say, "What about Friday?"

Within a few minutes, texts are relayed and I'm all set up..

Friday Morning, 0800, I face off with the Symphony.

Last thought before going to bed that night, you guessed it:

"problem with the plane??!"

 

What I found though, was this extra 24 hours proved to be a blessing, during that time, I relaxed..I went to PT, Neil worked on the muscles in my neck that tend to spasm and add to my motion sick feeling, and I showed up Friday morning feeling really relaxed and ready to face the task at hand.

 

First, we go into the conference room to do a little ground education.

I learn all about thrust, pitch, lift, drag and the angle of attack.

 

 

 

 

 

Now, a great deal of this I've heard many times from my sweet husband.  I also know, and somewhat remember Aaron (whom will be receiving a new name for the purpose of this blog...because Aaron just sounds like a really nice person's name...which he is until someone panics and powers up instead of down and is heading the airplane in the direction of fuel tanks--I'm just saying.-Oh..he needs a Jekyll and Hyde kind of name, because that's kind of the transition he makes...I will ponder this..hmmmm.)- anyway--

I remember Aaron going over this with me on Lesson Day 1..how the air molecules split up at the front of the wing and the top air molecule has to go faster to the back of the wing so they can meet up and "hold hands again". I learn what camber is and all about Bernoulli's Principle.

 

 

After I was given way more information than I could process, we proceeded out to the ramp to go over the pre-flight checklists. This consisted of me learning the entire anatomy of the airplane.

I was back in A & P I in college, and wishing I had a fill-in-the-blank diagram like we used when learning about the muscular system of the cat.

But no, it's a point and learn..and I may have retained most of it. Pitot tubes, breaks, flaps, various lights, fuel siphons, fuel tanks, kicking the tires and checking the oil.

 

 

 

Then the time came to once again, gather my bravado and climb into the cockpit.  More pre-flight checklists..I mean..how do people make mistakes if they go by these very detailed checklists every time?..Perhaps they skip a step or two.

Anyway, I  climb in, don my headset and off we go on another adventure.  Because my instructor doesn't believe in "babying" new pilots...I taxi to the runway. My biggest challenge is eye-hand coordination, getting the feel of the rudders, the brakes and the stick.

With verbal assistance, I lift the airplane in take-off and the next thing I know--we are flying.

I felt much more at ease in the Symphony. I'm not sure if it's the closed cockpit, or the side-by-side seating, or the motion sickness medicine I took beforehand, but whatever it is, today is better than my last time up.

 

I get into a little trouble with my instructor because he wants me to fly visually, and I keep cheating with the instruments. I used the attitude indicator a lot.

Attitude indicator.

 

 

I need to learn to trust myself with eyeballing the horizon and where the my airplane's position is in relation to what I see.  I fully expect to have my gauges totally covered on my next lesson.

 

We did a maneuver where we flew over the runway, at about 10 feet over the runway...totally freaked me out. Everything felt very close and scary. I panicked a few times.

I was told this is all normal...I guess it depends on what you call normal.

 

We finally landed and for some unknown reason, Aaron deemed me capable of taxiing in.  I now laugh at his judgement. I had to change from using the stick and the rudders to just the rudders.

For some other unknown reason, he thought it was helpful to keep saying, "that sticks not gonna help you, use the rudders"...OBVIOUSLY..AARON...I CAN'T THINK RIGHT NOW...!!!  BARKING AT ME ISN'T GOING TO HELP!!

 So I swerved and sped up at the wrong times, headed straight for a bunch of fuel tanks, totally missed the parking spot he told me to aim for. 

Now let me say that after the low-over-the-runway-flying thing...I was DONE...my body, coordination, everything was just DONE. I thought one thing and my body seemed to do the opposite.  However, I managed to comply and finally parked the plane.

 

My parking spot.

 

 

 

True to form, upon taxiing in, I see Bob out on the ramp with his camera.  He snapped a few photos and  welcomed me back to the real world.

 

Me, turning off the controls, doing the post flight checklist with Aaron.

 

 

 

 

Here I am with my tongue hung out, totally whipped.

 

 

So, all in all--I finally feel like I could possibly be capable of mastering this. One thing Aaron kept telling me is, "You are in charge. You make the airplane do what you want it to do."

I feel better knowing I'm in the company of many others that struggled with the controls and the panic issue.  I don't think I was altogether wonderful--yet, I don't think I was altogether horrible either.

 

I left with greater resolve than I showed up with. I know I have a great deal to learn and honestly, many aspects of piloting a plane still scare the hell out of me..but I can see that with this is something I can learn. I just have to be determined, focused and disciplined.

 

So now, I guess I should learn how to be determined, focused and disciplined.

This is not an activity for the weak-willed or faint of heart.

And in my eyes, it makes my husband even more of a super hero.

To think he has done this as a profession--not just responsible for himself, but for a crew and an airplane full of passengers. Oh to be that confident and certain of my abilities!

Thanks Honey for the inspiration!

Thanks Aaron for the instruction!

and

Thanks to my lifelong friend (and sometimes foe), Chiari Malformation Type 1--that has pushed me to not accept life with limitations, spurring me on to master my fears and

to live life to the fullest.

 

 

"The brave may not live forever - but the cautious do not live at all!"
~ Sir Richard Branson

 



Posted 13 minutes ago by Michele Robinson Collum, RN BSN